Tales of the Deceitful.
This is a follow up of the previous article on JC2s student in SAJC doing whatever they can to get the JC1s to enrol in their respective CCAs. Our reporters had to go under the guise of a JC1 in order to truly experience the lies that were presented so nicely to them. Becoz of this, their identity would have to be kept secret. This is a first time account.
Student councils get a huge "fan base" after the orientation with the JC1s. They appear to be the "cool" cca among the j1s and has become the undisputed choice of CCA for them. BUT: What the j1s do not know is that councillors only get to be "cool" once a year, and that effectively means only once in their entire college life. Instead j1s who eventually become councillors will have to spend lots of their precious time doing boring stuff like cleaning the student center. Doesn't get more "cool", i suppose.
Dance society has got a sudden influx of students signing up for audition this year. And one suspects that its also due to their performance during the orientation finale. j1s thinking of signing up for dance could merely be going for the limelight. BUT: how many chances of performing do the dance society actually get? Most of the time they would be left to figure out gay moves and try implicit actions on each other.
ODAC as usual is the most popular CCA in college. They boast of a strength of only 30 odd outdoor freaks in college doing all the most expensive college sponsored activities, but always gets more than hundred odd ppl signing up trying to take a shot at being accepted into the exciting club. BUT: While alot of the j1s are told odac activities include rock-climbing, kayaking etc... the "etc" mentioned here is nothing more than physical trainings. An occasional camp, some first aid, and tonnes of lameness, that just about makes up the ODAC that so many j1s believes to be "happening"
Touch Rugby is the third cca with over a hundred sign-ups after dance and odac, so they must be included in this as well. Touch Rugby is a new sport among most j1s and most of the gals are excited about trying it out, aspiring jonny wilkinsons. Touch rugby also claims membership to an array of pretty ladies with a nice tan. One of the best strategy they use is simply to have these pretty girls at the sign-up booth to attract all the sexually abnormal female homo sapien sapiens. Touch is really the oogle place, no doubt. BUT: j1s forget that its still a sport afterall and there's always competition involved. The team needs only a limited number to players to represent the college and the rest of the ladies can continue doing their fashion parade, or do up themselves to be ready for next year's cca sign-up day to trick the next batch of innocents.
co-op is one of the 5 major "service CCAs". Giving members the chance to invest in the co-op itself and earning 5% interest at the end of the year could prove to be right move to attract money-faced money-face. Co-op seems prestigious with the posts ranging from director to managers. BUT: under all these "posts" is a CCA that does nothing except slack and wait for students to throw their money into the "non-profitable" co-op. one suspects how the members makes money if it really is non-profitable. Co-operators being profit-seeking rationale business-minded students,would never let slip a chance to expand their profit margin. While all other CCAs is busy promoting their CCA, co-op sets up a booth and starts selling their glutted supply at "discount price". How smart can they get to think that students would even be interested. It ends off with a wasted effort and the opportunity cost of it all far exceeds the few pencils that they actually sell. Little wonder so many VENNers are in co-op. They don't take econs to appreciate something called the economist's profit. Its all accountants out there. stupid accountants.
Strategy club comes up with a more-than-strategic way of attracting students. Pasting posters practically and impractically everywhere. Take for example the toilets. On sign-up day itself, they provide students with free chess-boards to play in the hope that students would join for the free chess sessions they could have if they join. With too much neuro glands used to store chess moves, they forgot that popular bookstore sells chess for merely $1.03. The co-op does well to beat popular with a competitive price of $1.
All the above is the truest account and is actually a tradition carried on and on for years that passed. It is not intended to promote or undermine any CCA groups mentioned or not mentioned in this article.
~reported by someone not called ivan~
Commitments Up for Grabs!!
Its another wednesday afternoon in SAJC, early release, late reporting, just quite the usual stuff...(it seems..) But while the college anticipates for the boring lessons to bore themselves away, another thing is on their minds. COLLEGE CCA ENROLMENT!! This could be the closest to a carnival to SAJC could come to not counting the ten thousand fund raising carnivals each year. This carnival aims not at people's money, nor promoting school prestige as the most colorfully t-shirted college in s'pore. This carnival...has a hidden agenda that is being carried out by the students, ON the students. To be precise... JC2s on JC1s. It that period of sudden renewed loyalty to CCA and all previous bad-mouthing of long hours of commitment seem to be exiled from everyone's neuro glands. And self made-to-believe ficticious positivities of the CCA suddenly spring out of nowhere. And every CCA is suddenly a "not-to-be-missed" We shall visit the carnival at SAJC and bring to you the tales of the desperate recruiters!! Stay tuned for tomorrow's edition to witness the atrocities of the deceitful!!
~reported by ivan~
Principal of S-AJC declares late start to school day on wednesdays
Mrs Lim C. Tin, principal of the infamous St Androgynous Junior College, declares that as of week 1, 2004, school will only start at 8.15am instead of the usual 7.25am. This move by the principal is justified as "giving the teachers a chance to meet up every week", however any student with the intellect to make it to S-AJC would clearly know that its just a lame excuse by the principal. Although the true reason is not confirmed as yet, but many more reasons that sounds more plausible than the one given is being speculated at the college already.
The first school of thought is of cause the usual "point-finger-at-lim-c-tin" point of view. These group of students fervently believe that Mrs Lim is still wasting school resources by playing badminton in the air-conditioned hall. Now that Mrs Lim has made a public clarification that she "pays for her sessions in the hall", this group of students need to find another way to undermine Mrs Lim's prestige in SAJC. They believe that Mrs Lim made wednesday's school start late simply because she, like all other students, wants to sleep more. This is backed up by the fact that she plays her badminton in the air-conditioned hall every tuesday. Need we explain further?
The second school of thought believes that Mrs Lim has already lost her footing in the school politics. She no longer has a say. The DP, along wif Mr cilus and a few other powerful teacher like the swaggering K has taken over office during a coup d'etat over the holidays. This view point of course has its own evidences to support its thesis. Mrs Lim, for one, has not been seen talking to the JC2s ever since school re-opened. It was always the DP. Another reason is that while Mr Muthu-with-the-hair-in-the-ear is actually the dicipline master in SAJC, Silus and Swaggering K has been stamping their presence all over the students. But in order to prevent an uprising, the conspirators have decided to use Mrs Lim as figure-head and (dis)credit her with everything, like saying she declared wednesday's late starter.
The third school of thought actually worships Mrs Lim. They are in awe of her great leadership qualities and believe that it is actually her craft to declare this. She understands that the school is not really pleased wif her after her badminton issue, and then subsequently with her "embezzlement issue" (read crapaper previous post by Rebecca) She declares this late-starter just to get student support and maybe even sway the teachers (non-aligned parties) to her side in her struggle against the conspirators.
Whichever reason it is, we are pretty sure that the reason made known is not valid. It is merely a charade put up to pull the wool over the innocent JC1s' eyes. But the JC2s sees beyond.
~reported by ivan~
